Sunday, October 2, 2011

Where do we stand?

I actually think a lot and write my feelings down.

I just don't really like expressing how I feel unless I'm like super-overwhelmed or something.

I guess I'm just afraid I'd get judged wrongly or misunderstood and then in the end I'm the one who looks like a fool cause this has definitely happened many times.

But the motivational speech last Friday made me think "Hey, it's not that bad to be who you are."

Cause humans were never meant to always win and succeed, nor were they always meant to lose and fail.

No, I'm not going to say that "I should never change because I am me....bla bla bla" because I want to be a better person but I will say that I'm just someone who wants to give it her all in life and to face each day with gratitude.

Some people are far more worse than me. So why should I of all people complain?

It's hard to get my real feelings out. Really.
I get so choked up fighting against myself whether or not to tell others stuff.
I mean, it's really hard for me to truly open up.

So if I've shared stuff with you, it means I really trust you. It doesn't matter what kind of stuff.
From a bloated puppy to guys and stuff.
I don't really go around telling people how I honestly feel about these kind of things.

Okay, going to bath and then study and then sleep. Cause I need it.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Study management

I currently have a very weird way of studying at home.

I'll finish one essay question for History in 25 minutes and then I'll stop, walk around, draw, drink water and then get back on the next question.

Seems to be doing good. But I'm only using this technique when doing essay questions.

Cause I hate them.

I love doing notes the most cause I get to learn even more stuff. And it's even better when you write them down in color using color felt pens. :)


My neck is really red and splotchy. Can hardly concentrate with it.

Going back to studying now cause you know, lazy people won't get anywhere in life according to what the speaker said in yesterday's motivational speech for SFC Day and I feel like "Wow. I'm such a scum and I should get to studying!"

Must work out even more too cause the steroids makes my legs turn into jelly. =-=; Ugh.

Study study study!!!! :D